How to Keep Kids Out of Co-Parenting Conflict with Dr. Jann Blackstone

A dad's car blew up while he was behind on child support. His plan for telling Mom about the replacement was to send his young child with the message. The child froze, Mom found out anyway, and the kid stopped wanting to go to Dad's.

In this episode, Katherine Miller is joined by Bonus Families founder and director, Dr. Jann Blackstone to unpack how kids end up as messengers. Jann spent 35 years as a custody mediator and co-parenting counselor, and she explains what to do when your ex won't cooperate. You'll leave with language for your next hard conversation.

What you'll learn:

Why "need to know" is all a difficult co-parent gets from youHow a backpack note puts your child in the middleWhat to say instead of badmouthing when your ex gets it wrongWhen to rewrite a parenting plan your kids have outgrownHighlights:

(00:00) Meet Dr. Jann Blackstone

(02:49) What "put the kids first" really means

(05:37) Why co-parents only need "need to know"

(08:21) The "best parent syndrome" and custody

(11:18) Co-parenting versus parallel parenting

(13:04) The backpack note that put a child in the middle

(14:16) The new car story and a kid stuck as messenger

(17:47) Why "mommy is mistaken" beats badmouthing