228: Why Don’t ADHD Kids Listen? with Luba Patlakh

When a child repeatedly fails to follow instructions, gives one-word answers, or has an intense reaction to a small request, it may look like defiance. But the real challenge may be how their brain is processing, organizing, and communicating information after they hear it. In this episode of The Soaring Child Podcast, Dana Kay speaks with speech-language pathologist and myofunctional therapist Luba Patlakh about one of the most overlooked areas of ADHD: communication. They explore how executive functioning, hearing, language processing, sensory needs, airway health, sleep, and emotional regulation can all influence a child's ability to listen and respond. Luba also explains why parents should be cautious about being told to simply "wait and see" when they notice developmental or communication concerns. She shares the signs that may warrant a professional evaluation, how speech therapy differs from occupational and physical therapy, and why a multidisciplinary approach can help families better understand what is happening beneath a child's behavior. Parents will also learn practical strategies they can begin using immediately, including how to pause before reacting, gather meaningful observations, model language, and use Luba's "field of two" technique to encourage children to communicate their needs more clearly. This conversation is a supportive reminder that behavior is often communication, and that understanding the reason behind a child's struggle can lead to more compassionate and effective support.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW

Luba Patlakh's Website - https://lubapatlakh.com/

Luba Patlakh on Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=18908878

Luba Patlakh on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lubapatlakh/

Luba Patlakh on LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/lubapatlakh

The Growth Lab Podcast on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@thegrowthlabpodcast KEY

TAKEAWAYS

[00:00] A child may hear a parent's instruction but struggle with what happens next, including processing, organizing, remembering, and responding to the information.

[03:53] Parents should examine when and where communication breakdowns occur rather than immediately assuming a child is ignoring them or behaving badly.

[05:10] A lack of response can be useful information. Luba encourages parents to collect observations and consider executive functioning, hearing, cognition, and language processing.

[06:34] Formal assessments from qualified professionals can help d