Why "How Was Your Day?" Doesn't Work, And What Actually Gets Kids Talking

Getting nothing but "fine"? 

Dr. Aliza Pressman on why your questions shut kids down and what actually gets them to open up and talk to you. 

If "How was your day?" only ever gets you a "fine" (or an eye roll), you're not alone, and it doesn't mean something is wrong in your relationship. In this episode of Raising Good Humans, developmental psychologist Dr. Aliza Pressman explains why so many kids stop sharing around the elementary school years, and why pushing for details usually backfires. Drawing on research on how children and teens decide what to share, she shows that kids open up to parents who feel approachable, not just available, and that how you react to the small, everyday stories decides whether they'll come to you with the big ones. 

What you’ll learn:

- Why kids share more with parents who are approachable, not just available 

- The Goldilocks reaction: how to respond when your child tells you something surprising so they keep talking 

- Why micro-moments of connection matter more than big "tell me everything" talks 

- Specific, low-stakes questions to use instead of "How was your day?" (and when to stop asking altogether) 

- How to get the information you need when safety is at stake without being nosy 

- Creative ways in: word games, family game night, your child's interests, and other trusted adults 

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